The other day on the way home, I was thinking about past relationship and just how lucky I am to be married to such a good man. She truly is everything that I ever hoped and dreamed of. I had 3 serious relationships before meeting Andrew. The first was for 3 years in high school. I was young and so was he and now that I look back on it I realize that the reason it lasted so long was because it was conformable. He was my first kiss and first relationship, and really it was just more of a friendship. After we broke up, he was in college, I was in high school, he met someone, got married, and we lost touch. I hope he is truly happy.
The second guy was what I thought was love. I cared for him deeply, but he was not good to me. He called me names, he hit me, and ran me down emotionally. My view of myself was awful and I had no self esteem. We would break-up, get back together, and do it all over again for a 1 1/2 years. Then I got smart, went to college, and was done with him. Even though it was a learning experience for me and I trusted no one, I also hope in some way he has grown up, learned from these mistakes, and is happy.
The third guy was all that I wanted. He was cute, sweet, and driven.......or so I though. What he really was not what I thought. He was a cheater, not driven, and just followed the crowd. At a time we had a plan to go to the same college and be together........maybe for the rest of our lives. Little did I know that God had other plans and I learned that I was ok with that.
I was single for about a year, give or take, and just had fun at college. I went to concerts with the girls, I was a cheerleader, and I was in class. I hung out with friends and had a good time. But I prayed for God to put a good man in my life. I was sick of being single, but still willing to wait for the right guy. On a nightly drive and talk with my best friend Andrea I told her all that I wanted in a guy.......a guy who was sweet, funny, dresses nice and took care of me but also knew how to get dirty and have fun. I wanted a guy who loved the Lord like I did and wanted the same things in life that I did. Just one week later she told me that she knew the perfect guy, I was nervous because she had tried to set me up before and those did not turn out so well, but I let her try. That weekend, I went on a group date with other girls and guys and "he" went to. We talked during dinner(at Hooters, on Valentine's Day, mind you) and bowling, and hit it off. We talked at school all week and the next weekend we went out on a date by ourselves. It was great! We have been together each day since February 22, 2003. He is the greatest man I have ever met and I am so lucky to be married to him. We have been blessed with a good life, but in the beginning with all of the things I had been through I was not a very trusting person, and rightfully so. I had been cheated on, hit, and knocked down in every sense of the way. But Andrew taught me how to trust again, told me that he would never leave me, and would never hurt me. And I can say in 9 years he has held up every end of that word. How did I get so lucky I will never know. But I am thankful that I did.
So as I was driving home the other day, I heard this song. It pretty much defines us. It is from the 90's, but here you go:
Not on your love by Jeff Carson
WE BOTH SAID SOME THINGS WE DON'T REALLY MEAN
SOMETIMES LOVE CAN BE LIKE THAT
AND RIGHT NOW THEY HURT, BUT THEY'RE ONLY WORDS
THERE NOTHIN' WE CAN'T TAKE BACK
BUT EVERY TIME WE DON'T SEE EYE TO EYE
YOU WORRY I MIGHT SAY GOODBYE
NOT ON YOUR LOVE, NOT IN THIS LIFE
COULD I EVER LEAVE, I WOULDN'T THINK TWICE
OF LETTING YOU GO, BY NOW YOU SHOULD KNOW I NEED YOU TOO MUCH
NOT ON YOUR LOVE, NO WAY IN THIS WORLD
COULD I EVER LIVE WITHOUT YOU GIRL
WHEN TIMES GET TOUGH, I'M NOT GIVING UP
NOT ON YOUR LOVE
WHEN WE STARTED OUT WE MADE A VOW
NOT TO SLEEP 'TILL WE SETTLED THE FIGHT
AND THERE HAVE BEEN TIMES WE'VE SEEN THE SUN RISE
BUT, IT ALWAYS WORKED OUT ALRIGHT
EVEN IN THE DARKEST HOUR BEFORE DAWN
I NEVER THOUGHT OF MOVING ON
NOT ON YOUR LOVE, NOT IN THIS LIFE
COULD I EVER LEAVE, I WOULDN'T THINK TWICE
OF LETTING YOU GO, BY NOW YOU SHOULD KNOW I NEED YOU TOO MUCH
NOT ON YOUR LOVE, NO WAY IN THIS WORLD
COULD I EVER LIVE WITHOUT YOU GIRL
WHEN TIMES GET TOUGH, I'M NOT GIVING UP
NOT ON YOUR LOVE
WHEN TIMES GET TOUGH, I'M NOT GIVING UP
NOT ON YOUR LOVE
I love you Andrew, thanks for making me happy, teaching me what true happiness is, and for teaching me to trust again. You truly are the greatest man I have even met(besides my dad) and I love you with all of my heart!
